Author
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Topic: UNDERSTANDING WOMEN part I
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Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 01:56 AM
have you ever made the stupid mistake of trying to understand girls, trying to logicaly understand their behavior? have you ever thought to your self "women who understands them?" you are not alone, we have all made that mistake before but let me tell you something, if you think like a guy and try to understand women you wont get far. its like trying to make sence out of a chinese alphabet when you only know english, it wont happen lets first analize what girls watch and like as a group and what guys like as a group, we like sports, oh hell yeah the thrill of contact sports , foot ball,basket ball,soccer, and what maganzines enternein us, playboy (hehhehe you know you like it )
now girls, they like soap operas, fashion magazines,love stories, romance novels. (whats the fun in that? right zzzzzz boring) lets analize this a little bit more MEN when talking in groups we tend to be direct, to the point and in your face right? we dont bull sh!t around over some small details or on meaningless drama. we go strait to the point. WOMEN they make a big azz deal over small details,they like the drama and they ramble on on how she feels it, how good she is feeling it small ity bity details that make no sence to us. man they over analyze everithing. have you ever felt that things in this board contradicts itself? have you ever said, what the f*ck do they think? is this true? you think well we act as if we are not interested and they persue you? we dont call them right away, but i thought when some one was interested called the same day? this makes no sence to us men. make your life simple thought dont try to logically analize this board because it wont make any sence to us, we do not have the same desires or needs as women. all the stuff in this board has worked for us and are proven methods (well most of the stuff here anyways )just stick to what works do not and i mean do not try to make it logical cause it wont work. girls have grown some bad habits in the past millions of years and that is being in control of the relationship,lets face it guys if she wants to have sex with us we do it, we go as far as they want. well to be a great dj you should make her feel that it is not her the one who is in control but You yes you. do things that you want to do when you want to do it, not when she asks you too. never and i mean never do exactly what a girl tells you to do never. you must be in control. when girls asks you to do something for her do not be nice and do it, those are just test they test you all the damm time one way or another to figure out if you are worthy of her. to past those test is to simply not take em, lets say a girl is sitting at her desk and she drops something and tells you to pick it up, assuming that she has the authority to take alittle of your time to do something for her simply cause she got a puzzy. how do you past that test, simply smile and say you can do it your self, in a joking manner. do not play their games if they are playing games with you just call her on it and tell her you aint going to play anygames. they test you by being bratty, *****y, emotional,demanding. simply make them understand that you will not change your life style, your taste in music or anything that you like or want. in other words you will not change your personality for her, if she wants you she will have to adampt to you. lets say she tells you "i hate rock music its to loud" and you are listening to rock (please do not do the afc move to say what do you like and put the music she likes, NO, dont do it )tell her "well you might as well get use to it cause its what i like and you are going to hear it alot" stay tuned for UNDERSTANDING WOMEN part II cause its my bed time and im damm tired
------------------ Confidence is the key to women THE DJ BIBLE IP: 204.157.40.158 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 02:20 AM
You see everyone? That post is exactly why men don't understand women. Men speculate too much.Women spend all their time wondering why men don't get it, and men spend all their time wondering if they've finally figured out how women think. hehe its funny. Quote "now girls, they like soap operas, fashion magazines,love stories, romance novels. (whats the fun in that? right zzzzzz boring)" Why is that boring? Because you're MALE; its supposed to be boring to you. Men are not women, we are not the same. But there are guys who do think like women in some ways, and those guys are usually considered homosexual.
IP: 206.100.220.46 |
Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 02:23 AM
Tru dat. It's a lost cause. I really think is a waste of time to think too much. Heh, gotta love the irony. IP: 209.148.200.54 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 02:33 AM
Oh my GOD! I'm a MAN! (except for the whole Playboy thing.) I LOVE sports, camping, hiking, fishing (I tie AND bait my OWN hook, thank you very much!). I can't stand soap operas, talk shows or those corny romance novels. I'm really MAD that I don't get to have a penis to write my name in the snow, though! Well, I suppose I could do that if I really tried to now, but I'd have to buy new shoes. 8-(
IP: 209.240.222.131 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 02:40 AM
Women aren't all that difficult to understand once you get the hang of it. The first, and MOST important thing to learn is the difference in communication styles. When a man talks about a problem he is looking for a solution and wants feedback. When a woman talks about a problem she just wants someone to listen to her say it out loud, and she will usually figure out the solution in the process. Couples try to instinctively give their mate what they need. Since a man assumes she wants him to offer suggestions, he does just that, meaning to be helpful. The woman just wants you to listen, not tell her what to do...she'll think you are being bossy. The guy pours it all our expecting his woman's advice or ideas and she doesn't give any because she thinks he just wants her to listen. LOLIP: 209.240.222.131 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 02:43 AM
Hehe, thats hilarious wyldfire. I think you stole my manliness too. My own mom asked me if I was g*y (yeah, I am a total girl, hehe). IP: 206.100.220.46 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 02:49 AM
quote: Originally posted by ExtremeCelery: Hehe, thats hilarious wyldfire. I think you stole my manliness too. My own mom asked me if I was g*y (yeah, I am a total girl, hehe).
Wanna go shoe shopping??!!?? hee hee IP: 209.240.222.131 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 02:54 AM
Actually. . . I do want to go shoe shopping, I believe that one can never have enough shoes. I only have 14 pairs right now. It makes me sad to think about it. =)IP: 206.100.220.46 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 03:00 AM
quote: Originally posted by ExtremeCelery: Actually. . . I do want to go shoe shopping, I believe that one can never have enough shoes. I only have 14 pairs right now. It makes me sad to think about it. =)
lol...well, I need new ones now. It snowed here tonight! ;o) IP: 209.240.222.131 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 07:17 AM
Men think. Women feel. That's why you're wasting your time trying to argue with a woman about anything. All you'll get is her emotional response *to the last thing you said.* No thread, no logic, no continuity. THe flip side is that this is why games like SS and eliciting primary values work. Once a chick starts feeling the right things about you, she's yours. So when you do a pick up, remember that being funny or cute or sharp-looking, or doing kino, appearing confident, or knowing how to give neg hits isn't what actually works. All of these are just the tools you use to get the chick *feeling* horny, good, happy, excited, whatever, and associating those feelings with you. The problem is that women are not all the same. They all value some feelings more than others. Or they're screwed up and will only allow themselves to feel certain things once they've felt certain other things. The real skill comes from reading what a chick wants to feel, and giving it to her. DJ wannabes have a one-size-fits-all approach that works with a lot of women. But master DJs know how to read those feelings, how to feed them back, and how to improvise new approaches that get the feeling states they want. Meanwhile all the AFCs believe that 'being nice' will get the emotional response they want. Which is like going out for a gourmet meal with a plastic spoon - it's not that being nice is bad, it's just *the wrong tool* for picking up most women. What you really want, and what master DJs have, is a big well-equipped toolbox. IP: 172.188.25.130 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 07:25 AM
Well, it looks like you just woke up wyldfire and you had something onyour mind huh? hehe, goodmorning. =)IP: 206.100.220.46 |
Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 07:52 AM
I always find it amusing when the discussion comes up about understanding the opposite sex. "Men are straight forward, to the point, take action, etc". Well, if that is point, fact, then 95% of the advice here is wasted as it pertains to imaging, manipulating situations and just about everything other than the above. On the other hand, we often see comments that "women are game players, emotional manipulators, testers, etc." Both are generalizations that are made because we have to have rational explainations for things that we don't understand. For example, the mythological god Apollo was created so that man could explain how the sun was "Pulled" across the sky. Fact is men and women come from different makeups and are basically raised different. Men grow up with concepts such as feeling and emotions impede performance. For example, statements in youth for guys commonly heard are: suck it up, walk it off, get over it, pain is gain, real men don't eat quiche...(damn, and I like quiche). Men are also brought up to strategize and operate as a team. Traditionally men grow up playing football, baseball, basketball, soccer, etc. It is all about actions determining victors and losers. Most situations create a winner and a loser, no room for emotional introspection. Women on the other hand have more of a relational make up. Instead of immediate solutions to solve problems, they prefer support and time to become comfortable with their decisions. Remember, they have much more emotionally on the line, regarding their commitments in relationships than men do, because when they commit they see it as long term from the start, where as most men see only the now, knowing that they can adjust strategies if situations change. The same for women when they are growing up. Girls play games that are more based on situations and relationships and that usually result in win-win situations that leave all parties feeling good. Girls also tend to interelate in smaller groups of two, three or four, as opposed to guys who have fraternal relationships (i.e. teams, frats, gangs, etc.) Just a little food for thought, all.
------------------ *The man that says a thing is impossible is often interrupted by the man doing it. The laws of physics say that a bumblebee is not aerodynamically designed to fly. Fortunately, noone to the bumble bee, he flies anyway. "Instead, know the truth. There is no spoon." (also known as Gonconaugh) IP: 65.32.22.252 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 10:21 AM
Wild Thang wrote "The real skill comes from reading what a chick wants to feel, and giving it to her."Thanks, dude, for this great tidbit! Yes, I get in tune with the gal I'm with and I observe all the tell tale signs and I gauge things accordingly to what she's feeling at that moment in time. IP: 24.108.141.138 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 06:54 PM
WildThang is definately right on target here... I don't think a DJ can be sucessful until he realizes what WildThang said is dead on correct.IP: 172.155.198.141 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 07:06 PM
Thanks, Irish, for taking so much time and effort to research the differences between men and women! I just printed out your discourse and I will be gleaning the gems from your post. Terrific work, dude!IP: 24.108.141.138 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 10:08 PM
what is "eliciting primary values"?also, if you find yourself in an argument with a woman, what action should you take? based on the advice above I think you should stop talking. is that correct? leave the situation, too, perhaps? stated another way, how should you make her feel when she is arguing with you? how does she want to feel, in that sitution? does she want to feel strong, does she want to feel you are strong, something like that maybe? IP: 67.160.96.99 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 10:33 PM
hey hey hey hey, wait a minute time out!!!! what is that nonses about making girls feel the way they want to feel, you should always and i mean always be IN CONTROL DO NOT AND I MEAN DO NOT ever EVER let the girl be in control of the situation. if you are in an argument with her and she is insulting you just walk away thats it!!! she want to feel in control and demanding and all of that, she wants to feel powerful and offending DO NOT LET HER never accept such disrespect from noone be it man or women its all about you if she wants to feel this way today and that way tomorrow and you always work hard to make her feel the way she wants to feel. lets say today she feels b*tchy and feels like insulting you are you going to let her? HELL NO, always be incontrol and if she wants to desrespect you walk away. its all about you and your self respect do not make such an AFC move as to do everything she wants. remeber you are confident, in control and strong act acordingly and do not let anyone walk over you. ------------------ Confidence is the key to women THE DJ BIBLE [This message has been edited by improvingdonjuan (edited 11-01-2001).] IP: 204.157.40.34 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-01-2001 11:37 PM
quote: Originally posted by improvingdonjuan: hey hey hey hey, wait a minute time out!!!! what is that nonses about making girls feel the way they want to feel, you should always and i mean always be [b]IN CONTROL DO NOT AND I MEAN DO NOT ever EVER let the girl be in control of the situation. if you are in an argument with her and she is insulting you just walk away thats it!!! she want to feel in control and demanding and all of that, she wants to feel powerful and offending DO NOT LET HER never accept such disrespect from noone be it man or women its all about you if she wants to feel this way today and that way tomorrow and you always work hard to make her feel the way she wants to feel. lets say today she feels b*tchy and feels like insulting you are you going to let her? HELL NO, always be incontrol and if she wants to desrespect you walk away. its all about you and your self respect do not make such an AFC move as to do everything she wants. remeber you are confident, in control and strong act acordingly and do not let anyone walk over you. [/B]
No one should tolerate disrespect, whether they be men or women. Each person should be in control of themselves and neither should be in "control" of the relationship. If one person is trying to exert control over the other person it's going to be a power struggle that results in a lot of frustration and resentment. Been there, done that. Ideally, both the man and the woman should respect each other enough to compromise. If a couple always does what one person wants and that one person always has to have their own way, the other person is going to feel insignificant and unimportant and their self esteem is going to hit rock bottom. Then they stop taking care of themselves, gain weight, have a miserable, negative attitude and are NO fun to be around. IP: 209.240.222.131 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-02-2001 12:25 AM
quote: Originally posted by Wyldfire: Women aren't all that difficult to understand once you get the hang of it. The first, and MOST important thing to learn is the difference in communication styles. When a man talks about a problem he is looking for a solution and wants feedback. When a woman talks about a problem she just wants someone to listen to her say it out loud, and she will usually figure out the solution in the process. Couples try to instinctively give their mate what they need. Since a man assumes she wants him to offer suggestions, he does just that, meaning to be helpful. The woman just wants you to listen, not tell her what to do...she'll think you are being bossy. The guy pours it all our expecting his woman's advice or ideas and she doesn't give any because she thinks he just wants her to listen. LOL
men wants to be listen to also, but men just suck in general at communicating and empathizing....and we think of life like a game and were in competition to be the best all the time IP: 24.25.111.184 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-02-2001 02:16 AM
quote: Originally posted by Selfesteemboy: men wants to be listen to also, but men just suck in general at communicating and empathizing....and we think of life like a game and were in competition to be the best all the time
I think when men finally decide to talk about something that's bothering them, they tend to do it because they are stumped about what to do. That's not saying they don't want people to listen as well. Most women pour their hearts out just looking to be told "It'll be alright, you'll figure it out." UNLESS (hee hee, there's always one of those exceptions with us females!) she asks for advice. Another important thing to remember is that when it comes to physical attention and doing nice things for each other...look at what the woman does and do the same for her. What she does is a very good indicator of what she wants from you. IP: 209.240.222.131 |
Don Juan
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posted 11-02-2001 02:50 AM
i think what's funny is that all the tips on this thread is posted by men.. where are all the females in this forum
IP: 128.110.27.33 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-02-2001 01:07 PM
quote: Originally posted by siegeboy: i think what's funny is that all the tips on this thread is posted by men.. where are all the females in this forum
---------------- Wyldfire is a 35 year old Master Don Juanita (female) who has contributed loads of juicy tidbits (which I have printed and digested in my reading room, i.e., the boy's room ) about what make women tick. IP: 142.16.22.18 |
Moderator
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posted 11-02-2001 03:10 PM
Tips Forum.IP: 24.4.254.107 |
Moderator
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posted 11-02-2001 03:38 PM
quote: Originally posted by Wyldfire: No one should tolerate disrespect, whether they be men or women. Each person should be in control of themselves and neither should be in "control" of the relationship. If one person is trying to exert control over the other person it's going to be a power struggle that results in a lot of frustration and resentment. Been there, done that. Ideally, both the man and the woman should respect each other enough to compromise. If a couple always does what one person wants and that one person always has to have their own way, the other person is going to feel insignificant and unimportant and their self esteem is going to hit rock bottom. Then they stop taking care of themselves, gain weight, have a miserable, negative attitude and are NO fun to be around.
Sorry, but you are thinking like a guy. Women don't think that way. Guys SHOULD be in control most of the time. That doesn't mean that you should disregard what she wants to do on a date, for example, but that the MAN controls the situation. This isn't about control over the other person, it's about control of yourself, and the relationship. Guys should ALWAYS have that. IP: 216.37.5.241 |
Master Don Juan
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posted 11-03-2001 01:49 AM
quote: Originally posted by Sir_Chancealot: Sorry, but you are thinking like a guy. Women don't think that way. Guys SHOULD be in control most of the time. That doesn't mean that you should disregard what she wants to do on a date, for example, but that the MAN controls the situation.This isn't about control over the other person, it's about control of yourself, and the relationship. Guys should ALWAYS have that.
LOL... You're going to have to elaborate for me as to what you mean in having control of the relationship. I want to be certain of what you mean before responding. IP: 209.240.222.131 | |