The Don Juan Center

Discussion Forum Hall of Fame

Chat Room



  Don Juan Discussion Forum
  Don Juan Tips
  What I've learned...

Post New Topic  Post A Reply
profile | register | preferences | faq | search

UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! next newest topic | next oldest topic
Author Topic:   What I've learned...
Pook

Master Don Juan
posted 02-03-2001 07:05 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Pook     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I know everyone has different objectives on this forum. Mine was a long term relationship.

After being away from this forum for a long while, I've realized what I think are conclusive things.

Anti-Dump is right all the way. Speed seduction, for the case of long term relationships, is worthless.

I would get results with speed seduction. But I might as well have been an actor. I enjoyed getting responses, but I was never happy.

Forget NLP, forget Speed Seduction, unless you wish to practice them all your life. For a long term relationship, they are worthless.

Anti-Dump and the advice on the website is much much better and actually works.

I have flaws, as does anyone else. Speed seduction could veil them, but I want to be accepted for myself and my flaws as well. True love demands the acceptance of the entire package.

Here's what I noticed to be extremely effective:

1) Go for the number, go for the date. (Guys should not flirt. Women flirt. The job of guys is to ask for the number and to call for the date. This cuts through all women's games.)

2) Don't talk about yourself! (Focus the conversation on her or on her interests. Only mention things about you if they are the same: "Yes, I think the same about parrots being evil too." So many women have said that I'm a 'mystery'. "Is this good?" "Yes" This is because when I do comment on myself, it is very vague and general. I keep my mouth shut. Also, you come across as a good listener. A good listener is the most sexiest trait a guy can have.)

3) Demand respect! (She may not give you her company, she may not give you her affection, but she should always, and I mean always, give you her respect. Women will not stay with guys they don't respect, and you wouldn't want to be with a woman that didn't respect you anyway.)

4) Don't be afraid to disagree. (This runs contrary to Speed Seduction. No, do not seek disagreements. If possible, try to bypass them. But never be afraid to disagree. Women want guys who have a mind of their own.)

5) Women are never the priority. (Your life is more important. Women take a backseat to your passions and hobbies. Failure to do this makes you desperate.)

Most imporantly, be yourself. Speed seduction will not give you happiness. You want to be accepted for who you are, not because you memorized patterns and lines from an internet website. Being yourself does not mean being a shy sniveling nice guy, it also includes self improvement.

You cannot 'act' yourself into happiness. Away with the NLP! Away with the Speed Seduction! Being yourself may give you more failures in dating, but it is the only path to true happiness.
--testing---
Pook
"As you think, you shall become."
"Men will be nice when nice guys get laid."

[This message has been edited by Pook (edited 02-26-2002).]

IP: 158.135.1.100

Gator Ash

Don Juan
posted 02-03-2001 11:25 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Gator Ash   Click Here to Email Gator Ash     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I would have to agree that simply using Speed Seduction the way you described will most likely not get you what you seek, along term relationship. On, the other hand don't take SS to represent the scope of what NLP can do for you personally. You can use it to remove limiting beliefs, install new attitudes in yourself, etc. In fact, if you were to master the language patterns of NLP, you would be able to communicate with greater elegance and actually understand what people really "mean" to a greater degree. And you would find that useful for getting a long term relationship. In fact, you could probably even experience greater success in your professional life and impact other people positively in a very profound way. Now, how much would like that?

For a site that shows you how to learn and use NLP with INTEGRITY go to http://www.neurosemantics.com

IP: 128.227.127.184

sosuave.com

Administrator
posted 02-05-2001 11:01 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for sosuave.com   Click Here to Email sosuave.com     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Tips forum.

IP: 24.93.77.118

Don the Legend

Master Don Juan
posted 01-10-2002 02:33 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Don the Legend   Click Here to Email Don the Legend     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
bump

IP: 65.69.95.209

Maximus

Don Juan
posted 01-11-2002 02:53 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Maximus   Click Here to Email Maximus     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Pook:

Most imporantly, [b]be yourself
.

Being yourself may give you more failures in dating, but it is the only path to true happiness.

[/B]



Here here!

To be yourself, you must first know your self.

To know yourself is to accept the bad with the good.

To accept yourself means you are truly content with who you are.

If you are content, you do not care what others think about you, and respect them just the same.

If you do not care what others think, you are not overly concerned about how you act or speak in front of someone.

If you no longer worry about how you act and speak, being yourself becomes innate, not forced or faked.

You are you.

Like minds tend to find each other.

Therefore, you are what you think. You find what you seek, so to speak.

Excellent post Pook!

Maximus


------------------
The Way of The
Simpleton - A
simpleton: lays down
no first law, takes
everything that
happens as it comes.
The simplicity of the
truly sophisticated.

---- Bruce Lee

IP: 209.202.57.44

gekkoca

Don Juan
posted 01-11-2002 04:45 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for gekkoca     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Well said POOK...
So are you saying dont use KINO?
I am going to a movie with a young 21 yr old tommorrow night.I am 31 yrs old.Would you recomend me not putting my arm around her!Is that KINO to you?This woman made fun about a date once that hesitated forever trying to put his arm around her.We laughed about it as he was being meek.I was planning on acting like that geek in imitation to get a laugh out of her.Would this be different as I am being playful?
You say to be yourself and not use NLP.So what if I am the quiet type.Just remain being quiet and speechlittle?Or do you believe in faking it till you make it.Have you tried NLP before or speed seduction?Or have you always been natural at this game.

IP: 24.66.94.141

Pook

Master Don Juan
posted 01-11-2002 10:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Pook     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
This is an old post. My thoughts have changed some, but its generally the same. I guess I should post more often.

gekkoca, you are worrying too da*m much. A date cannot be a social chess, you both will go home unhappy. In short, focus entirely on the FUN.

Make sure you are well rested, groomed in the way that makes you comfortable, therefore you are more natural and carefree. I'd go easy on the kino. (Its better to give a hug than shake hands, for example).

------------------
Pook
"As you think, you shall become."
"The biggest risk you can take is not to risk at all."

IP: 158.135.8.136

MrSassyPants

Master Don Juan
posted 01-12-2002 04:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for MrSassyPants     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Its been a long time since I've been around, but I'd advise against putting your arm around her. Its a widely acknowledged (move) on a date. It seems cheesy and desperate. I would use all the kino I could (all of it very subtle and non-sexual).

Ultimately, you'll get away with a lot more kino if you act confident and restrained.

A guy that's confident and strong will send shivers up a girl's back if he lightly touches the small of her back on the way up stairs (assuming its appropiate). A guy that seems like he's moving fast and trying to "get something" will give her the willies with the same move.

Remember, good kino is subtle, non sexual and mutual.

IP: 172.161.48.39

All times are ET (US)

next newest topic | next oldest topic

Administrative Options: Close Topic | Archive/Move | Delete Topic
Post New Topic  Post A Reply
Hop to:

Contact Us | The Don Juan Center

Powered by Infopop www.infopop.com © 2000
Ultimate Bulletin Board 5.45b